Adventures in Gig World: The Importance of Being Nice

In the performance world you’ll hear the phrase “If you want to see who someone really is, watch how they treat the stage hands.”

In gig world, I am the stage hand of New York City.

I see people’s true colors, and sometimes they aren’t pretty. I’m continually talked down to because surely lowly event staff have the brain capacity of a fruit fly. I’ve been called a bitch for not handing over extra freebies. “You’ll lose your job for this asshole” is a common threat when I won’t let someone “important” in without a ticket. Perhaps the worst was getting full on screamed at for deviously ruining a grand champion tennis match because the charging device I gave her died.

To put it bluntly, I’ve been shit on time and time again.

Life Tip: Shooting the messenger is rarely a wise strategy for getting what you want.

While I see the worst in people, I also get to see the best. I’ve met countless people who are kind, generous, courteous, and respectful. They understand I’m doing my job as instructed, engage in friendly conversation, and some people have even come to my rescue when particularly belligerent Karen is having a go.

People from all ranges of the niceness spectrum will be at free events. Ticketed events are  toss up. You never really know what types of people you’ll be engaging with until it’s go time.

This past week, I was booked for ritzy event in Brooklyn with the highest entry price I’ve seen: a business in tech with a 50 million dollar evaluation, minimum.

Successful tech developers and business owners from across the United States and Europe met for a day of forums, panels, and networking. The session topics ranged from buying property in the metaverse to using brain-mapping to prevent disease.

Myself along with 9 other giggers would do various tasks including registration, greeting, ushering, wayfinding, and forum door duties. The tasks would be mundane, and the attendees would either make the 10 hour shift drag along or fly by.  Would they be mean? Kind? Uppity? Down to earth? Setting expectations is a fool’s errand, and I like to take a “set the bar low so you can only exceed expectations” approach.

Turns out I didn’t need to set the bar low at all.

The average attendee was surprisingly young and quite casual. There were plenty of sneakers paired with suits and dresses, but there were also plenty of “dress down Friday” ensembles of jeans and tshirts. Ties and heels are for finance and the corporate world. Cool sneakers and backpacks are for tech gurus who are leading us to a better future.

The casualness took me aback. But what really amazed me was how kind, courteous and humble these genius multi-millionaires were. Let me give some examples:

• We had to re-register everybody for the day with a green name tag. The white one from the day before was no longer valid. At other events, this would elicit a “who do you  think, you are?!?” response. At this event, there wasn’t a single snarky comment or eye roll made.
• When a session was full, we had to turn people away. At other events, attendees would throw the “don’t you  know who I am?!” card.  At this event, people kindly responded “I understand, it’s my fault for being late.”

The attendees treated the staff like they treated each other. Something that I rarely experience at events such as these.

5pm hit before I knew it. I backed my bags and made the trek home.

Changing the world is tough. Small acts of kindness are easy, and can be surprisingly impactful. Saying thank you, holding the door open,  or even just a smile can go a long way. Life is full of hardships, hate, struggles, and setbacks.  Why add another straw to the camel’s back with harsh comments and emotion-fueled lash outs?

My mom always says, “You can’t always control what happens to you in life,  but you change what you do about it.”

Another day, another gig.